That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
