apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
