He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
