I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
