yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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