remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
