paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
it wasn't lemon gatorade
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
