At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize