you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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