you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I AM VODKA MAN
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
