Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
