It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
