Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
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