Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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