We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
