No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize