I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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