Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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