I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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