you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
