This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
