Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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