Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
The air was thick with penises
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
