Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
