Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
