Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Randomize
