i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
we're making bets on your personal life
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
