I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
