It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
