yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
