i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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