My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
being pregnant is like rehab
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
