Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
