STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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