Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
i now understand why vodka
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
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