I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
