Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
