hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize
