i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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