It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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