I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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