I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
