I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Randomize
