I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Randomize
