My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
