We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
