I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Holy sore nipples Batman
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
