I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
