Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize