i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Randomize
